Tiny dancers

A couple of weeks ago I registered the girls for ballet. The class is for beginners, and spans from the end of August to May, concluding with a recital in May. The girls' cousin, Lexy (LEXY!!!!) attended this school for many years, and that endorsement has carried significant weight. The girls have been so excited about dance and have enjoyed talking about it at length.

This past weekend the school had an open house. I carefully tried to manage expectations as much as possible. In fact, I did not even tell them it was open house, merely that we were going to see where the class would be held and may peak inside so that they could see what to expect.

As an aside, many of you know that I worked for years (many, many years) until recently. Negotiation was a fundamental aspect of my job and, with past employers, I was the lucky recipient of some valuable training. One such course was a seminar created and presented by professors from Pepperdine University. One key takeaway from their three day seminar was expectations management. To me, it is the Holy Grail. I was a believer before the seminar, and I left more sure than ever.

Skip is an expectations management devotee as well, and we tend to map things out for the girls so that they largely know what to expect. The ballet open house was handled with extra care to manage what they could -- and could not -- expect once there. I told them that we would see where the class would be held and that we might be able to look inside. When queried, I confirmed that leotards would not be worn because there would absolutely not be class that day.

We arrived, and everything was quite lovely. Balloons led the way to the door. Once inside, several of the much older students were there to help register new students. Their teacher fitted them for ballet shoes, and we placed an order. Lauren greeted everyone with a hug, and promptly asked, "What's your name?" Gracie liked the refreshments, and Skip guessed (correctly, I'm sure) that she is going to expect cookies every week when she attends class.

Everything was going great until Lauren asked to dance. The older girls giggled and said, "Oh, how sweet! She wants to dance today!" Lauren is not one to let go of an idea so she became fixated on dancing. The owner overheard and said, "Well, we have the back room set up with music, and she's welcomed to dance in there."

Problem solved.

But not really. As I said, when Lauren has an idea, it is firmly and specifically fixed in her mind. She wanted to dance in costume -- in her leotard. Lauren wanted to transform into a ballerina on the spot, and we -- her parents -- were holding her back!

Here she is, crying that she wants to wear her leotard:



Receiving some consolation from Skip:



Gracie, on the other hand, made full use of the music, open space and mirrors. She had a good time dancing.



We left before the full blown wailing erupted so we managed to leave on a high note. (Actually, we quickly pushed Lauren through the exit and made it outside before the open-mouthed screaming erupted in earnest.) An afternoon nap allowed for more logical thinking to prevail, and she is, once again, very excited that class will begin in a couple of weeks. Let's just hope we don't have to make the same exit after the first class. In the meantime, I will be working to manage Gracie's cookie expectations.